Chaye Sarah, Genesis 23:1-25:18

Our Torah portion begins with the death of matriarch Sarah. She dies at the age of 127 in the city of Hebron. Immediately her husband Abraham mourns her passing but he also quickly attends to her burial. Abraham makes arrangements to bury Sarah in the cave of Machpelah, which he purchases from Ephron the Hittite. The portion outlines in great detail the negotiation for the burial site and the terms of the agreement. Abraham pays 400 shekels of silver for the land of Ephron the Hittite.

The fact that Abraham paid such a dear price for this parcel of land makes clear that although this is part of the promised land, Abraham wants no argument from those that already reside there. He purchases this plot of land so that Sarah will rest in peace and the Hittites will have no further claim upon the land. He will hold title to it free and clear.

Abraham has to deal with this business transaction at time of grief. One can only imagine that he is not really up for the task and perhaps this is even why he agrees to pay such an exorbitant price for this parcel of land. Perhaps Abraham simply wants to make the arrangements as quickly as possible, so Sarah can be buried properly.

We should all learn from Abraham’s dilemma. Most of us want to ignore the question of where and how we shall be buried. It is unpleasant to think about and to deal with and yet, if we leave it to our loved ones to deal with after we are dead, we place a terrible burden upon them. Perhaps like Abraham, they will be taken advantage of and pay more than necessary. Perhaps your final wishes will not be followed. Waiting until a loved one dies to make burial arrangements inevitably makes the process more painful and difficult than it needs to be.

That is why this week’s Torah portion is a good reminder that each of us needs to consider several questions in this regard. Where will you be buried when you die? Who will take care of the decisions? Have you made any arrangements or made your wishes known? Perhaps with the reading of this week’s Torah portion this is a good time to review your legal paperwork. Do you have a will or trust that specifies what kinds of burial arrangements you would like?

While these are difficult issues to face death comes to us all in the end. It is better to be prepared and not make our loved ones face unnecessary trials and pain when we are gone.

If you would like a preplanning checklist to help you organize your final arrangements, email me at rabbi@Kol-ami.org. I will be happy to send you one.

Posted by Lee at November 2, 2004 04:14 PM